a humorous twist on Dreidel (the Chanukah toy) by Rabbi Israel Rubin, (originally published in the syndicated Holiday Guide family of Newspapers)

A HIGH-TECH DREIDEL?

In a world of 3-D video games and surfing the Internet, kids may look skeptically at dreidels – no color graphics, no electronic sounds and no batteries needed. How could a toy like that possibly be fun? Even though the dreidel has been played with by children for thousands of years, kids today may find this simple little top a bit “low-tech” for their liking. For those modern day kids who think playing the dreidel game is soooo bo-ring, here’s a new spin on the way we look at this favorite Chanukah toy.

THE OFFICIAL DREIDEL OPERATORS MANUAL

 You are now the proud owner of a high-quality, state of the art “Dreidel” which can make you a winner! A multi-faceted, interactive educational and entertainment micro-system, the versatile Dreidel utilizes maximum kinetic transfer technology, putting years of wondrous experience at your fingertips.

Rapidly rotating on its axis, the Dreidel is driven by centrifugal forces that defy gravitational pull. The Dreidel operates efficiently on renewable energy sources at high, medium and low speeds. Velocity and RPM levels are adjusted by the flick of a finger. Perfectly balanced and precision engineered, the Dreidel is virtually maintenance free. It has no moving parts, and no batteries or upgrades are required.

TO USE: Hold joystick-like handle in upright position, using thumb and forefinger to accelerate. Best when operated on smooth surfaces with low coefficient of friction. Device may appear stationary, but sound indicates Dreidel is in use.

After completing its spinning mode, the Dreidel reaches its turning point and begins to gyrate, displaying various conic sections as it decelerates. Dreidel will then shut down automatically. Quick turnaround time allows Dreidel to be used repeatedly. Follow instruction code indicated above and restart.